Friday, October 25, 2013

Perfectionism - the little demon!

I've been talking myself out of MANY things lately by claiming that I can't do X until all of this Y is in perfect order. I really want to do X and will do X as soon as I'm caught up on Y. If only I didn't always have so much Y to do, I'd be able to have time for X.
What is my X? In general, ART.
What is my Y? Oh, so many mindless things ...
All the household junk that needs to be done but really doesn't need to
consume my days the way I allow it to sometimes. It's the busy work I make for myself continually making 'to do' lists instead of just buckling down and 'doing.'
It's the quick errands run that turns into a day of leisure shopping because I don't want to go home and do the items on my 'to do' list.
It's too much and too often unnecessary computer time.
Even when I commit to art I hold myself back.
I want to make a project but need certain supplies.
I take time to gather/buy all the supplies but need to learn the techniques.
I take an online class to learn the techniques but don't want to 'waste' the supplies by using them on something unworthy of keeping so I don't try anything at all.
I take in all this knowledge through the course but don't allow myself the slightest
learning curve necessary to get started actually applying it.
It's time to stop this madness!

Perfectionism needs to be kicked to the curb!
It's time to gently allow myself to be imperfect, inexperienced, and
awkward at something new instead of expecting to ace it the first time through.
A book I'm currently reading, The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown,
is reinforcing this big time -- and boy, do I need to hear it regularly!

I'm imperfect and I'm enough!
It's time to allow myself to make mistakes and create ugly art
but learn through the process instead of expecting to create a masterpiece
every time I sit before a blank canvas.
It's time to start showing up to practice art instead of always having a plan to make
specific art. Really, no art created is unworthy when the
process of creating brings joy and satisfaction.
It's time to just show up -- imperfections welcome!

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